Profile Actions and View Actions Buttons

Ok getting tired of trying to figure out what buttons go where so I can 

1.) Place buttons so only users can see certain buttons on their profiles

2.) Place buttons so users can see certain buttons on other users profile pages

The Edit Profile button isn't working and creating a custom one just has it so users can see the Edit button on other users profile pages. There needs to be a way better system set up and easier one where it's not so complicated to toggle buttons and have to use test profiles and have 3 tabs open just to see where buttons are showing. 

I need this fixed and night after night I'm just going around in circles wasting time trying to figure out why half the buttons don't show up/work and what does Profile Actions and View Actions and their submenus etc even mean....

Why isn't it so hard to just have a setup that has 

1.) Buttons you will see on other profiles

2.) Buttons you will see on your own profile

Just two categories is all you need...